For any of you who know me, you know I am not a patient person by nature. My natural curiosity levels run 3 to 4 times higher than the average person. Today my patience is being oh so tested.
In order to get my apartment, I have to wait on verification papers from work, the bank, and my apartment in Kentucky. Also, I have to wait for 3 letters of reference from people not related to me. Needless to say, there is an empty apartment with my name on it, and it's sitting vacant. I feel like there is something I should be doing, yet on the same token I know all I can do is wait now. I hate feeling helpless. I just want to get it the freak done already.
My lack of patience stems from where I am at in my life right now. I am at a crossroads of a sorts. I finally started thinking and acting for myself. And now, that I have made my decisions, I have to wait for them to take shape. I am more than ready to start this next chapter of my life. I have never felt so sure about the choices I have made. I want to get this started. Instead, I keep hitting hurdles. Maybe the hurdles are to keep me from doing too much too soon. I'm not sure yet. All I know is that I am standing on the verge of the life that I want, and I have to be patient. Maybe it's time to break out the Serenity Prayer. Who knows. On the same token, everything is falling into place, thus confirming that my choices are the correct ones. So maybe the patience is all a part of the greater scheme of things. Maybe I need to learn to breathe.
That is one blessing that I have. I have someone who keeps me breathing, keeps me grounded. More about that person in blogs to come. The situation is complicated to say the least. I also have great friends who are supporting me no matter where I go. Without these people, I would truly be going insane. I have a loving father and family to help me..... maybe I should stop my bitching and count my blessings. Anyway, I have finally gotten the lady balls to stand up for myself, and I am not going to let my lack of patience derail me. I may not have all the answers, or the results when I want them. What I do have is a great support system and the confidence that my life is finally going in the right direction. I can't wait to start living it. My way, for once. (Go ahead Stacey, say "It's about damn time!" Lol It only took me how many years to listen to you?)
