This I Pray

So, there has been one thought on my mind a lot lately. And that thought has been working through bitterness/anger that I keep feeling for a handful of people in my life. When I stop and think about it, this bitterness is doing nothing but tearing me down. By being angry and bitter and reacting in a negative manner, I am no different from the people who I feel bitter twards. In the end, my feeling bitter and angry does nothing but stress me out. And, it gives the people I have these feelings twards the satisifaction of seeing me stressed, angry and bitter. I know that is really all that they want, to see me stress. They want to get under my skin, to know they've gotten to me. So this week I have decided to pray daily that God helps me work past these feelings. That when faced with a situation, I learn to let it go, as opposed to being angry/bitter. Life is too short and to precious a gift to spend it so stressed/angry/bitter. So I am going to focus on that. I am going to live my life to the fullest. I am going to be the woman God has created me to be. I am going to work on focusing on the positives in my life as opposed to the negatives. I know it is not going to be easy, but that is the incredible thing about God. He will be there to help me through when life gets hard. And he alone can change my heart and my thoughts. I pray that he does just that. I pray that he changes the way I think, so I no longer think toxic thoughts. I pray that he teaches me to love everyone as he loves everyone, so I may not have a hard heart. And I pray that he allows his love to show though me, so that everyone will know this life about him and him alone.

Does It Ever End?

So, this is going to be more of a vent than a blog, but I have got to get this out somewhere. Ok, here goes. Why, oh why are there girls in this world who thrive off creating drama for people?? And why, does it seem, that they always find me? Everyone out there knows the kind of girl that I am talking about. The ignorant ones who can't take a feaking hint, even when it hits them in the freaking forehead. The girl who always wants someone else's guy, the girl who has to get her little not-so-subtle digs in every chance she gets. The girl who, no matter how many times a guy says "get over it", still thinks he wants her back. I was really hoping that I had left all of those girls back in, gee, I don't know, MIDDLE SCHOOL. But nooooo, they seem to have followed me into my 20's. freaking awesome. And I know that this angry/vent kind of blog will not change a darn thing, but I can't hold it all inside. My head will explode, and I am not giving anyone that kind of satisfaction. So if ou have any ideas/thoughts/suggestions on how to learn to deal with these kinds of girls, feel free to leave them. I know someone will say "just ignore her, she'll go away." but we all know that is a noble idea, but it is not the truth of the matter. I just need to know ways to chillax myself and not want to pop the heads off girls after they pull one of their little stunts. That is my vent/rant, I am done now, I am going to listen to "Misery Business" by Paramore, and pretend that every girl in the world like I have just described can hear me.

I give it all to you.

Good morning everyone!! I'm writing this blog while snuggling in my hoodie with a warm mug of coffee. Fall is on it's way, that's for sure. I love fall. There is just something in the air in the fall that you don't get any other time of the year. Almost like a kind of magic in the air... it's a feeling...it's hard to explain. I just love it. Fall is a wonderful time for year to see God in action everywhere. The leaves changing colors, the change in weather... How can anyone experience fall and not see God in every moment, is beyond me. Anyway, as the seasons are changing, I have been thinking a lot about the ways that God has been at work in my life. I have to take time ot praise him for my brother coming home from Afghanistan early! He'll be home in December, rather than in May!! And the Lord is keeping him safe everyday. I can't wait to have him home soon. Also, ever since moving to Kentucky, the Lord has brought some amazing people in my life. He has blessed me with some incredible friends! They are all christian friends, who encourage me to look to God first in all that I do. He has also brought a guy into my life who is the definition of a gentleman. He is everything I have ever wanted in a guy, and then some. Even if he is a Buckeye. :) All of the people that God has brought into my life like me for me, they accept me the way that I am. And that is all I could ever ask for. God has also ignited a passion in me to go back to school for christian counseling/youth ministry. I am no longer afraid to use the gifts that he has given me. I am starting to embrace the many possibilities that he has for my life. It's hard to put into words, but through the Lord, I am starting to see myself as worthy, talented, and even beautiful. People who have known me for years are rejoycing right now. :) I guess I just wanted to take a blog and not only update y'all, but I wanted to give thanks and the glory to the only one who could initiate this kind of change in me: Jesus Christ. I would not be where I am today if it was not for him and his work in my life. I am blessed beyond what I am deserving of.